Press Release: Police Permit Needed For More Than 5 Readers?

November 23rd, 2007 gier

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Glenmarie Golf and Country Club: At the 19th hole of the GGCC today, the Director of MILF-PRON made a statement to anyone who would listen that he has uncovered a new proposed legislation by the government requiring all online weblogs (blogs) to have a police permit if they are expecting more than 5 simultaneous readers. Speaking from the bottom of his pint glass, the Director had this to say:

“As we all know, public gatherings of more than 5 people require a permit from the police in this country. The government, in their wisdom, have also decided to extend this law into the Interweb. From the information that I have obtained, this is so that the government can monitor any online discussions, especially those which touch on “sensitive” issues — such as race, religion, colour, Astro broadcast monopoly, communists, Amir Muhammad, sexy clothing of flight attendants, errorgenous … uh … eroginous … err … erogenous zones and other matters.”

He added, “This initiative by the government should act as a complement to the earlier initiative to register bloggers. Also, I would like to have another pint of Tiger, please.”

On the registration of bloggers, MILF-PRON as a simultaneously proactive and reactive research facility had taken the initiative to assist the government by providing an online form, as can be accessed here: Online Blogger Registration.

On the matter of mentera.org, MILF-PRON’s parent organisation, the Director stated that, “The permit is not needed for mentera.org, since they seldom have more than 2 readers at any one time. In addition, our studies have shown that the total number of readers for mentera.org is not 7 or 8 plus their pets as claimed by the blog owner, but is in fact nearer to 6. Without pets. How come that Tiger is taking so long?”

With regards to mechanisms for measuring the number of readers for a particular blog, the Director asserted that it’s very technical and that it should not concern the general public. However, he noted that the government is planning to spend RM 70,000,000,000 on upgrading the Interweb infrastructure for their MPs and offices, by installing IPv6 capable routers and refrigerators. While this would not have an impact to the rest of the country which do not have IPv6 capable toasters, it would at the very least help the government monitor their own MPs and the civil service.

Finally, the Director stated that all blog owners can apply for the police permit at any police station convenient to the policeman in charge at the station. Finally, finally, he also stated that MILF-PRON will soon be producing an online permit application form for blog owners which they can fill up and print for submission to the police station.

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